Once I decide that this time (no really, REALLY) this time I’m going to start losing weight it also dawns on me that I need to rein in my spending.

Coincidental connection? Hardly.

I love to eat. I love to lose myself in the joys of food. I love to indulge. And then indulge some more. Every day.

I like to spend money; however, I don’t love to spend money. I am far more conscientious about spending money than I could ever be about food. To my credit, I don’t indulge my cravings for designer handbags or shoes. I do save a significant portion of my income.

But when my eating goes out of control, so does my spending. Part of it is a simple cause and effect relationship. I like to eat good things. Good wines, good cheeses, good deserts and my favorite indulgence of all is a trendy and expensive restaurant. These things all cost money- a nice chunk of money. So when I go on eat-whatever-I-want sprees, my money is spent on food.

But, ultimately, the relationship is even deeper. Food is about control for me. If I am in control of my eating, I am healthier and thinner. But it feels so, so good to lose control. It feels exhilarating to say, “To hell with it, I’ll eat a package of cookies”. The same goes with money. It feels reckless and dangerous to spend without tallying my monthly budget in my head.

Now, the months ahead are financially unstable and I need to be ready for any situation. Now, I am fed up with carrying around 15 extra pounds and want to rejoin the world of the young and hot.

This time will be different. Here I go.